Funny Sex Stories About My Random Hookups
Everyone should know Tinder by now, if you don’t, you are missing you for sure. Sometimes though, it does make for some pretty funny sex stories. A few weeks ago I was swiping right and left when one guy, in particular, caught my eye. When we matched I send him a message immediately and he was so down to meet up. I knew exactly what I wanted to do him but I should have asked him for a dick pic before he showed up at my door.
I welcomed him in and we went right to it. He whispered in my ear how much better I looked in person. Also, after kissing my neck he looked straight into my eyes and told me how bad he wanted to taste my pussy. I was definitely up for that. He laid me on my back and spread my legs. Believe me, this guy’s tongue could do wonders. As he was sliding his tongue in and out of my cunt I pulled on his hair. I was so fucking wet I could feel my juices just dripping down my ass but he didn’t let it go to waste. Every so often he would lick all the way down my asshole to clean up my juices.
It was feeling amazing but I wanted to cum on his dick and I let him know. He stood up and I got right on my knees. As I pulled his pants down I found something I wasn’t expecting. He has the smallest dick I had ever seen. I’m going to take a wild a guess and say it was about two inches long. The only thing I could do was laugh. I laughed so hard his tiny little pecker went limp, making look like an oversized clitty.
“You’re such a bitch.”
He said as I was literally on the rolling on the floor laughing. And just like that I wasn’t even turned on anymore. I told him to leave, that never in a million years would I touch the thing in between his legs that he called a dick. After he left I went back to Tinder messaged another guy I had matched with but this time, I obviously asked him for a dick picture first.
Have a small dick and wanna have some fetish phone sex?
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