Social Distancing Sex at its Best – The Best Phone Fuck of Your Life
Social Distancing Sex – does that seem contradictory to you? You should know by now that the French Whore of Phone Sex Kingdom has a dirty imagination with absolutely no limits! So now that we’re all pretty much stuck at home and are told to avoid getting within six feet of anyone, what’s there to do? Sure you can watch movies, sure you binge watch TV shows, sure you can order take out, sure you can jack off alone… But doesn’t get that boring after a while? Yep, it sure does!
During these anxious times, it’s E-XXX-TREMELY important to release all stress and tension. If you’re into exercise, that’s definitely one way to do it. Outside of course, since all exercise facilities are closed and BEFORE your city’s curfew, right? Tough times…
But there IS an easier way to shake off all anguish and troubles AND respect our new social distancing rules. It’s to have naughty social distancing sex with me!
If you recall some of my stories about sex, having an orgasm (or three!) a day is very, VERY healthy. Cumming makes you happier by releasing serotonin, dopamine and endorphins. You also KILL STRESS when you blow a load thanks to a flow of oxytocin. AND even better: jacking off heightens your levels of cortisone WHICH BOOST YOUR IMMUNE SYSTEM! Take that, Mr. Corona-fucking-virus!
And in these times of necessary social distancing, fucking outside of your home isn’t exactly recommended. So how will you be achieving the above benefits of cumming? There’s no need to be alone. How about some hot, no limits, XXX social distancing sex with me instead?
Some of my favorite types of phone calls involve role-play. I don’t even care what it is – anything will get me off. Did you know I speak French fluently? It’s actually my first language, so if you wanna pull out the French slut out of me, by all means, I’m game! So who shall I be? Your French teacher perhaps? The naughty exchange student who needs to get her way? The French aupair who’s dying to try American sausage for breakfast?
But if you wanna get crazier, I’m game as well… got any characters you wanna play with? Marvel comics? Game of Thrones? – the ending SUCKED but I’ll still do it. Or Star Wars? (Hmm… Darth Vader’s mask seems like it would make for a great respirator, doesn’t it?)
If you call me at nighttime or in the evening, chances are I’ll be drinking a glass of wine (Sauvignon Blancs from New Zealand are my favorites). So I might be in the mood to talk a bit. If you want to, that is. Especially if your significant other is passed out already, or too busy bleaching her mustache. (And even if she wasn’t busy, what on Earth do you have to talk about after all these years of being together? Hm?)
In fact, you two have probably been practicing social distancing for a long, long time and certainly without any social distancing sex, or any type of sex at all!
The thing with chatting (and wine!) is that it can lead to very interesting conversations. Often they turn dirty. I like!
Mutual masturbation is mmmm, so hot and such a turn on! I’m armed and ready with my headset and my toys and I promise to be very, very descriptive. As long as you return the favor. Pretty soon, you’ll have me sitting on your face reaching down for your balls and jamming your big dick inside my mouth. Let’s see how far into my mouth I can take it – while keeping my mandatory six feet distance of course. Ha. I wouldn’t want to get into too much trouble. That’s the sexy beauty of social distancing sex.
And for those now working at home – you’re in luck! I am here all day, every day, waiting and wanting YOU. How’s that for a work break!
So how about it, babe? You up for some unprecedented social distancing sex with me? Grab a towel (save that precious Kleenex for some other type of business) and call me at 1-888-413-5974! I shall be waiting six feet away!
